


the game of kings.

by mage-pie (looselipssinksubs)



Category: The Queen's Thief - Megan Whalen Turner
Genre: Characters play D&D, F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-15
Updated: 2019-06-15
Packaged: 2020-05-12 04:42:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19221820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/looselipssinksubs/pseuds/mage-pie
Summary: After a long day of outwitting barons and ambassadors, it’s really very relaxing to fight a plain old dragon.





	the game of kings.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to westwind for beta-reading.

“Why can’t I wear armor?” asked the queen of Attolia. “If I am shooting fireballs, the enemy will naturally target me first.”

“It’s to keep the game balanced,” explained the merchant. “Otherwise the magic users would be too powerful. You can put up a shield against long-range attacks”—to illustrate, he took a glass bowl from the sideboard and upturned it over the little figurine of the sorceress—“and the rest of the party will keep the close-range enemies away.”

“Very well.” She shuffled through the papers in front of her. “If our woodsman brews a poison, how far can I throw the bottle? Or can I simply banish the liquid directly into the enemy’s body?”

The Magus gave her a grateful nod. Here, at last, was someone who truly valued his botanical knowledge as more than a curiosity.

“I’m beginning to feel sorry for the dragon,” remarked the queen of Eddis to her husband.

The king of Sounis picked up his figurine and trotted it across the table to give hers a kiss, careful to angle the upraised axe in a safer direction.

The merchant had learned the game from normal people who attacked dragons with swords and fireballs, or freezing spells if they were feeling clever. He had not reckoned on dealing with people who thought of politics and poisonings as part of normal life, people who had in fact had wars _with each other_ only a few years ago.

“Wait a minute,” said Sounis, looking up from the tabletop, where he was making his axe-warrior do a little dance with Eddis’s spear-woman. He turned to Attolia. “We have a bag that can hold anything, you can turn people into animals, and Gen can sneak you past all the outer defenses. We don’t need to fight the dragon—we can just turn it into a mouse.”

“The spell wears off after an hour,” pointed out the merchant. “What will you do with a live dragon trapped inside a small bag?” He regretted the words as soon as they were out of his mouth. He had meant to dissuade them from wandering this far off the story’s path, but instead they just kept getting _ideas._

A spark of savage glee ran through the assembled company. The king of Attolia, seeing that they were all in accord, said it out loud: “I believe we owe tribute to the King of Deme, don’t we?”

The merchant just barely kept from letting his head go _thunk_ on the table. It was going to be a long evening.


End file.
